You Know, I Do Miss You

We are excellent in moving on. Being away from Izzat, rarely meet up, I thought this friendship would sink to the deepest. But, I never regret my past. I never regret it a bit. Bygones is bygones, we all choose our path of life. Still, the bond didn’t loose.

Ain uttered something today, the lines which Izzat used to say, frequently. Even the tone is the same. Izzat used to mimic people and she’s good at it. Now that holiday is around the corner and D-Day also will be celebrated soon, I’m excited to see all of us get crazy again. Hyper tension kills students’ brain. Laughter is the best medicine, but sincerity is an eternal peace.

Recalling the time when all of us gathered at someone’s funeral. It’s a sad reunion however some of us still appreciate the friendship we ever built a long time ago. It has been 4 years. I doubt we would ever communicate again though we are not a distance away.

There are list of friends that I would love to thank for giving me the opportunity to know such lovely friends like you all. I’m nothing without them, either girls or guys. You know who you are ladies and gentlemen. Despite of lack conversation between us nowadays, my pray is always for all, may God bless our life.

Together we strive, to pursue a success life.

Hey You, Get Up And Smile

I finally bid my farewell to Physic papers. It’s a very tough day. Starting from 10 o’clock last night, I started to practice and re-read Physic, restraining myself from surfing the internet. That’s a good progress! Well done, Romai.

Unfortunately, I’m saturated and there’s no space left to absorb any kind of information. With the air-conditioner bugging my hands to write, cough that still haven’t finish its job, I stopped and tried to sleep. Why was it too hard to memorize and understand? I’m not even close! I think that’s what my heart was arguing last night.

I gave up and prayed for the dizziness to go away. However, luck was never on my side. Every 30 minutes I woke up due to weird dreams. I could even make a sequel for it! And every time my eyes get tired and wanted to rest, my mind still STRUGGLED to memorize the notes.

I feel like a loser, with zero confident that I would ever pass this paper. Until the very last minute, I bet to myself if I get atleast B for Physic, then it’ll will definitely encouraged me to master this killer subject.

Early in the morning, I treat myself with lots of smile to my heart. More than anyone knows. Trying to laugh so that I won't be nervous. Clear up my mind so I won't be stress. It lasted only for a moment until the reality dawned and knocked my sense. I said to Nad, 'I wonder why people look so happy today'.

And so, what I really understand is proved through my answers in paper 2. The structures and essays, I’m doomed! The car engine radiator, I have no idea what I’m mumbling about. But I wrote a full page of elaboration about 5 types of engine. I have no intention to leave blank, I tried so hard to make every word of mine make sense.

And the hydrometer, I don’t even know how it looks like, yet the question asked me to design the hydrometer – in my dream, I would. The question required the sensitivity, calibration and etc which I have read but not in details. So, figure it yourself. They cheered right after the bell rang. Yeah, killer papers, farewell.

Bio paper 3 tomorrow, then I’m free from exam.

Love Quote I Received

'Everyone says that love hurts, but that's not true. Loneliness hurts. rejection hurts. losing someone hurts. Envy hurts. Everyone gets these things confused with love, but in reality, love is the only thing in this world that covers up all the pain and makes someone feel wonderful again.' - This struck me real hard :)

Atleast I Could Breathe

There’s a long To-Do-List right after the killer exam is over. I’m waiting for that perfect time to come and so going to launch all the missions. Yet, I don’t think I’m able to finish all of it. It’s a long long list, really. I’m going to post it as a reminder. The bitter truth is I dislike To-Do-List as I prefer to go with the flow rather than treating myself like a robot, planning my day as if there’s no spontaneous actions would ever make a space for me.

Grrrrr! The stress is still there, never give me a break. Guess what? Due to the fact that I online frequently to play my zoo, I answered the way to produce new organism of plant in large amount by ‘breeding’. Then I re-checked it and giggling myself. I changed the answer of course. Anyhow, Bio papers aren’t really depressing compared to the others. I’m glad I succeed to finish it without any mental injuries or tears so did Bell.

Can’t believe this! We already got 2 papers! History and Agama both! I doubt we will ever get it this fast, or so. I’m planning to chill but the result has given me quite a disappointment. A part of me is relieved that I flunk out no papers. It’s more than I hope and I really need to stay in that class. Till then, idle.

Chemistry Revolves Around

Just a quickie on how I managed to survive from Chemistry paper. Paper 3 was fine, as fine as I thought it would be. In contrary for paper 1 and 2, I remember of chuckling cynically over the essays and structure questions. The Heat Capacity, Titration and etc was a day-mare. However, as usual I’ll fill the blanks. Giving no chance for empty spaces. Atleast I tried, right?

Pay for the consequences. I do feel Chemistry is not hard to understand. The concepts are simple but to apply it is impossible. I’m glad I actually starting to love Chemistry rather than Physic. But, I have to struggle harder if I want to get A+ for SPM. I don’t plan to pursue A+ without an effort. Time, please chill a bit will you? I seriously need time, badly.

Running In School Shoes

My intuition was right from the beginning. With my mind doing the math, my calculation wasn’t wrong. I’ve predicted that Nad’s mom would go to school a few minutes before the school dismissed. So, being cautious and smart is wise action for us both. Nad and I.

We walked to her house instead of calling from my house which is totally in opposite direction. So, after a minutes talking about Bio and complaining over Math papers, we arrived at the junction of her house. She planned to ask her more to give me a ride home when I volunteered to walk by myself.

As we stepped on the stairs, her mom was about to enter the car. She didn’t see us, we were invisible in her eyes. She drove right away for instant and Nad has set her feet to call her mom. She was running in her school shoes and perfect uniform, adding up the vest and bag in her grip. And I burst out giggling behind her.

For a moment, I thought it was impossible. And I planned to run back, waited for her mom to note us as she drove at the junction. But her mom was brilliant! She looked at the side mirror and saw her beloved daughter running ‘happily’. *laugh* Inside the car, the unstoppable laughter echoed in the atmosphere.

Rest In Peace Young Soul

Every fair from fair sometimes declines,

I took it from literature component to have a picture of this post. There’s been a death in an opposite house. My sight is blurred by busyness, and my focus is depleted. One soul of a very young boy has gone to His side, bidding a farewell to this temporary world. Regardless of funeral by funeral I’ve faced these 2 months, my humanity has never vanished from my heart.

I recall of the first time I heard about him. With an age of sweet 13, he suffered from leukemia. Being a far neighbor of mine, I caught glimpse of him sometimes whenever his dad used to pass by the road, my glances fell on his face, with a snow cap he wore. Tracing every bit of pain but none has ever shown. Only God knows how hurt I am, unable to understand his suffering wholly.

Over the months, he was completely disappeared from my eyes. Wondering if it was my fault for being too busy or I’m not caring enough. Even though I’ve never spoke to him, but his sister is the best senior I’ve ever met. I’ve ever known. It streaks my guts when I heard of this sad news. One thing I salute about this family, they never ever shows their difficulties towards other. Not even once my ears ever caught any, but I still can sense it.

A year has fleeted away and I still know nothing about him. Keeping in touch with his sister, I’m in no position to burden her with questions. Thought that I’m over-carefully taking care of someone’s heart, protecting it from vulnerable, I’ve missed to get to know of his latest status. That day when I stepped outside my house with pajama still as my attire, I saw car by car parked across the road. That’s when I knew it is too late…

Mom went for a visit, paying last respect while I’m at home. I’m not ready for another tears pouring on my lap. Blocking every medium which may cause tears to me except exam, it’s unavoidable. What an ego I have. Every single minute I felt guilty for not visiting, but I do what I should and what’s appropriate, I pay my respect through his sister.

Words were hiding behind my tongue as if I could no longer utter a word but I asked mom about the updates with mournful sight on my face. Mom is strong enough compared to me in confronting this situation. She told about a friend of her who broke down while reciting prayer for that innocent child.

And I’m here with a regret crossing my head. God love him more so he took his soul back to His side. Suffer that has come to an end for he could rest in peace. People said that God take someone because He loves them more. It has given me courage to be tougher. Crying doesn’t mean you’re weak, it’s just an expression anyway.

May his soul rest in peace.